Overcoming heartbreak: 5 steps to help you start your healing journey now

Published by: The Traces of Life Team | Reading time: 5 minutes

The pain is allowed.

The end of a relationship or a divorce often feels like an emotional meltdown. The world stands still while chaos rages within. It's a profound loss that needs time and space to heal. Many people try to suppress or ignore the pain, but this only prolongs the process. At Traces of Life, we believe that healing can only occur through active processing .

Today we want to give you five concrete steps to help you consciously walk this difficult path and refocus on yourself.

1. Accept the wave: Allow yourself to feel

The first and often most difficult step is acceptance. Stop fighting your feelings. Whether anger, sadness, emptiness, or despair – every feeling is allowed and valid.

• Practical tip: Set aside a "pain hour" each day to consciously grieve. Outside of this time, try to focus on small tasks. This creates structure and prevents emotions from dominating the entire day.

2. Create a "no-contact" zone

To truly heal, the wound needs to be left alone. Constantly seeking contact, following them on social media, or reading old messages is like salt in the wound.

• Practical tip: Temporarily delete the number and social media accounts from your sight. Use the time and energy gained to distract yourself with positive things that truly nourish you.

3. Rewrite history: Focus on the facts

During periods of pain, we tend to idealize the past and only see the good moments. This keeps us trapped. It's important to look at the relationship realistically.

• Practical tip: Take a pen and paper and write down, frankly, what really led to the breakup, what the red flags were, and what needs remained unmet in the relationship. This will ground you and help you let go of illusions.

4. Redefine your "self".

During a relationship, we often define ourselves through the "we." After a breakup, the big question is: Who am I without this person? This is the perfect time for profound self-reflection.

• Practical tip: Make a list of things you've always wanted to do but never had time for in the relationship: a new hobby, a course, a trip. Now is the time to rebuild your personal foundation.

5. Find a structured companion for processing.

The road to healing is long, and it's difficult to always find the motivation for the necessary reflection. A structured journal helps you record all the steps and delve deeper into your emotions than a blank notebook ever could.

Your guide to a new beginning

If you are looking for a tool that guides you through the phases of separation and provides you with specific questions and exercises:

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The book is designed to give you the space to organize your feelings and to go into the next phase of your life feeling stronger.